Stair-Climbing Faith

Hannah Whitehall Smith wrote in her journal in March of 1878:

Faith is the stairway that leads to the manifestation, but it is not the manifestation itself, and to settle down to a pure life of faith alone without the Divine response is to sit down on the stairway, and never reach the place to which the stairway was meant to lead. This I have done in common with hundreds of others, and as a consequence our souls have not experienced that conscious indwelling of the abiding Comforter which is plainly promised in the Bible, and which some Christians have most blessedly realized. I had however got contented with this way of living, and had settled it in my own mind, that this conscious experience was not for me, that it was a matter of temperament, or of health, and that I was called to a walk of faith alone.

But the deep down inward sense of lack always remained after all, but I would not notice it, thinking it must be temptation. Last spring however the Lord by a series of most remarkable providences stirred me up again to a most intense hunger and thirst after this blessing, and I have spent the year in almost one unceasing prayer. And now at the end I am brought in utter helplessness to the point of by faith claiming that I have the petition I have desired of Him, although I have no signs of His presence. It seems a desperate venture of faith, but it must be that His word is true, and that He that asketh receiveth. I am asking for that which I know is according to His will, therefore I receive it! It is mine!
—Journal, March 1878

(Smith, H. W., & Dieter, M. E. (1997).

The Christian's secret of a holy life :

The unpublished personal writings of Hannah Whitall Smith.

Oak Harbor: Logos Research Systems, Inc.)

Stair Climbing faith. That's what I wrote about in the September newsletter. But I didn't get everything that I wanted in there, so I thought I could ramble on a bit more here.

I believe that faith is a journey. If we use the staircase metaphor that Hannah Whitehall Smith uses above, faith is that journey wherein we climb toward the presence of God (assuming that I'm reading her journal entry correctly).

In a perfect world, we are always climbing up the stairs, getting closer and closer to God. More and more in the presence of God, we climb with more and more urgency and clarity toward the goal. In a perfect world. But I'm not a good stair climber. Sometimes I fall down stairs. No kidding. You'd think that after thirty-five and half good years of walking and stair climbing that I'd be better at it than I am, but, um...well, I sometimes get going too fast and fall UP the stairs. Sometimes I'm too careless and fall DOWN the stairs...sigh...

Anyway, my faith journey is a bit like that too. I'm climbing the stairs, alright, but sometimes I'm going REALLY SLOWLY and sometimes I'm not moving at all, and sometimes I'm actually WALKING BACKWARDS DOWN THE STAIRS -- which happens to be the title of a Larry Norman song that's stuck in my head right now. Here are the lyrics:

Larry Norman
“Walking Backwards Down the Stairs”
Walking backwards down the stairs

Trying to get higher

How can I get anywhere

Walking backwards down the stairs

Watching life elude me

Slipping through my grasp

Oh I know the truth at last

But to reach the top

I'veGot to stop from

Walking backwards down the stairs

Trying to get higher

How can I get anywhere

Walking backwards down the stairs

People stop to watch me

Wonder what I'm doing

What direction I'm pursuing

I pretend I'm free

But actually

I'mWalking backwards down the stairs

Trying to get higher

How can I get anywhere

Walking backwards down the stairs

I don't know if Larry ever read H.W. Smith - but it sure sounds like he did. No matter, the connection is there in my brain and now it's here on...um, not paper -- well, in this electronic whatever it is...

Sometimes I'm going up, sometimes I'm going down, sometimes I don't move at all. But I still have faith that at every step, up down or whatever, God is with me. Even if I don't "feel" His presence. Even if I don't deserve it. Even if it doesn't seem real... God is there...

Stair climbing faith...