Evil Donuts
There's a box of donuts in the room down the hall.
Unless you're me, that's not an ominous sentence, I realize. But I'm me (wow - that's almost as profound as Descartes, isn't it? heh) and it's a terribly threatening sentence.
You see, I love donuts - not in some wierd and emotionally unhealthy way - but in the normal and physically unhealthy way. They taste good. Mmmmmm....
There's a box of donuts in the room down the hall. And I'm the only one in the building today...
Okay - it's so very profound, I realize - but it's me. The first sentence should read, "There's a box with a few donuts left in it down the hall..." or, as I'm thinking about it now, "There's a box with a couple of donuts left in it down the hall..." Yep, only two left. Never mind how many WERE there this morning, there won't be any left by the time I leave here around 3:00 today...
So, why are they down the hall if I'm the only one in the building? It's stupid, really. Maybe I won't eat the last two if I have to walk down there to get them. I have to make the decision to get up from here, walk down the hall (only about 30 feet, but still) and go in the room and open the box and decide which donut to eat (the good ones are all gone now...) and carry it back to my office. Now, I'm not so lazy that I thought the 30 feet would be too much for me. I have that 20 seconds or whatever to decide, "Will I go back to my office and get some work done, or will I really get a donut and eat it..." So far, I haven't turned back to my office in that 20 seconds...but MAYBE next time...
The point? I've been a Christian long enough now to know that I don't accidently sin too often. I walk down the hall, I open the box and I decide which sin I'm going to commit... It's a willful decision - and never a good one. Granted, a lot of the really big stuff I've dealt with now - or, rather, God has dealt with me in the really big areas now (unless I can't see something - big old log in my eye kinda thing). But, still, I choose to fail. I'm still a procrastinator - but in some really big and important ways. I'm still cruel to people who love me sometimes - and I hate myself for it and I know better and I still do it. I still run away from the stuff that God really wants me to do to do the stuff that I want to do...
Example: I'm taking the youth group to a Bebo Norman concert tonight. I don't know much about Bebo's music, but it should be a good time. I'm taking 4 kids. I kept putting off calling the youth of the church about it until it was too late to call and I only called the "regulars." Now, I probably wouldn't have gotten more than the 4 who are going even if I would have pushed it for the last three weeks - but that's not the point. I CHOSE to not make the calls. Not because I'm lazy, not because I'm too busy - because I'm stubbornly disobedient. That's the only reason...
God, save me from myself (and the last two donuts...)
Unless you're me, that's not an ominous sentence, I realize. But I'm me (wow - that's almost as profound as Descartes, isn't it? heh) and it's a terribly threatening sentence.
You see, I love donuts - not in some wierd and emotionally unhealthy way - but in the normal and physically unhealthy way. They taste good. Mmmmmm....
There's a box of donuts in the room down the hall. And I'm the only one in the building today...
Okay - it's so very profound, I realize - but it's me. The first sentence should read, "There's a box with a few donuts left in it down the hall..." or, as I'm thinking about it now, "There's a box with a couple of donuts left in it down the hall..." Yep, only two left. Never mind how many WERE there this morning, there won't be any left by the time I leave here around 3:00 today...
So, why are they down the hall if I'm the only one in the building? It's stupid, really. Maybe I won't eat the last two if I have to walk down there to get them. I have to make the decision to get up from here, walk down the hall (only about 30 feet, but still) and go in the room and open the box and decide which donut to eat (the good ones are all gone now...) and carry it back to my office. Now, I'm not so lazy that I thought the 30 feet would be too much for me. I have that 20 seconds or whatever to decide, "Will I go back to my office and get some work done, or will I really get a donut and eat it..." So far, I haven't turned back to my office in that 20 seconds...but MAYBE next time...
The point? I've been a Christian long enough now to know that I don't accidently sin too often. I walk down the hall, I open the box and I decide which sin I'm going to commit... It's a willful decision - and never a good one. Granted, a lot of the really big stuff I've dealt with now - or, rather, God has dealt with me in the really big areas now (unless I can't see something - big old log in my eye kinda thing). But, still, I choose to fail. I'm still a procrastinator - but in some really big and important ways. I'm still cruel to people who love me sometimes - and I hate myself for it and I know better and I still do it. I still run away from the stuff that God really wants me to do to do the stuff that I want to do...
Example: I'm taking the youth group to a Bebo Norman concert tonight. I don't know much about Bebo's music, but it should be a good time. I'm taking 4 kids. I kept putting off calling the youth of the church about it until it was too late to call and I only called the "regulars." Now, I probably wouldn't have gotten more than the 4 who are going even if I would have pushed it for the last three weeks - but that's not the point. I CHOSE to not make the calls. Not because I'm lazy, not because I'm too busy - because I'm stubbornly disobedient. That's the only reason...
God, save me from myself (and the last two donuts...)
Comments
- Amazing. Simply breathtaking. I laughed, I cried, it moved me Bob.